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Tips for Your Labor Partner

Before Labor Begins: 3 to 4 weeks before due date


What's going on?

  • Lightening

  • Increased frequency of Braxton-Hicks contractions

  • Early effacement and dilation

  • Increased vaginal discharge

  • Leveling off or loss of weight (1-3 lbs.)

How is she feeling?

  • Excited, sense of anticipation
  • Depressed
  • Has difficulty sleeping - very tired
  • Has spurt of energy

What should she do?

  • Simplify housekeeping
  • Pack suitcase and Lamaze bag
  • Conserve energy - take naps
  • Preregister at hospital, if not done already
  • Practice exercises, relaxation, and breathing techniques DAILY

How can I help her?

  • Assist with housekeeping chores
  • Encourage her to rest
  • Provide diversion - take walks, eat out, etc.
  • Practice relaxation and breathing techniques with her

Beginning of Labor

What's going on?

She may experience any or all of the following:

  • contractions
  • loss of mucus plug
  • leaking or rupture of membranes
  • bowel movements

How is she feeling?

  • Excited
  • Apprehensive
  • Talkative

What should she do?

  • Try to sleep if at night
  • Continue normal daytime activities
  • Take a walk
  • Take a shower, wash hair, shave legs
  • Eat a light meal

How can I help her?

  • Time contractions
  • Reassure her (of her readiness for labor)
  • Call babysitter
  • If at night, encourage her to sleep and sleep yourself
  • Eat a good meal

Early Phase

What's going on?

  • Effacement and dilation of the cervix from 0-3 centimeters
  • Contractions 5-20 min. apart, lasting 30-45 sec. Becoming longer, stronger and more frequent

How is she feeling?

  • Confident
  • Sociable

What should she do?

  • Relax with contractions
  • Begin slow paced breathing if necessary
  • Assume upright position as much as possible
  • Alternate being up with short rest periods
  • Empty bladder every hour
  • Call physician or midwife
  • Drink plenty of fluids
  • Eat lightly as tolerated

How can I help her?

  • Time and record contractions
  • Remind her to relax, use touch relaxation
  • Give encourage-ment, praise her
  • Help her with her breathing, if necessary
  • Offer fluids frequently
  • Prepare for trip to hospital
  • Encourage walking and position changes
  • Remind her to urinate
  • Use distractions - play cards, games, go to a movie

Active Phase

What's going on?

  • Dilation from 4-7 centimeters with more effacement
  • Contractions 2-4 minutes apart, lasting 45-60 sec. with greater intensity and longer peaks

How is she feeling?

  • Anxious
  • Apprehensive - doubts ability to handle labor
  • Serious mood - birth oriented
  • Attention turned inward
  • Not talkative

What should she do?

  • Continue relaxation and breathing techniques
  • Use focal point
  • Do effleurage as desired
  • Change position frequently
  • Continue to urinate hourly
  • Adjust pillows for comfort
  • Go to the hospital or birth center
  • Drink fluids frequently(sports drinks are recommended)

How can I help her?

  • If walking, support her body during contractions
  • Assist with effleurage or offer lots of massage, stroking and counter pressure, especially on her back if it feels comfortable to her 
  • Protect your back while massaging by positioning yourself close and lean into her body as you massage
  • Provide cool wash cloth for face
  • Give ice chips (if available) or wet wash cloth to suck on
  • Offer fluids frequently
  • Remind her to change positions and urinate
  • Keep her informed of her progress
  • Cue relaxation
  • Rest when she rests
  • Encourage relaxation and assist with breathing 
  • If breathing seems ineffective, suggest changing pattern (make sure breathing is rhythmic)
  • Watch for signs of transition
  • Keep up your energy by snacking on food brought from home

Transition

What's going on?

  • Dilation from 7-10 centimeters
  • Contractions 1-1/2 to 2 min. apart, lasting 60-90 sec, extremely long and erratic, possibly with more than one peak

How is she feeling?

She may experience one or more of the following:

  • Panicky, feels like giving up
  • Irritable
  • Desires not to be touched
  • Forgetful, disoriented
  • Rectal pressure, premature urge to push
  • Nausea/vomiting
  • Alternating hot/cold feeling
  • Trembling of the legs

What should she do?

  • Remember this phase is intense but SHORT
  • Take one contraction at a time
  • Change breathing technique as needed
  • Eliminate cleansing breath if contraction peaks immediately
  • Blow with premature urge to push
  • Use slow-paced breathing between contractions

How can I help her?

  • Do not leave her for any reason!
  • Remind her it is transition; Labor is almost over; Baby is coming; She can do it
  • Praise her lavishly for her efforts
  • Do not be offended by remarks
  • Screen out annoying disturbances
  • Keep conversation to a minimum
  • Communicate with medical staff, keep calm, do not argue
  • Apply back pressure
  • Call nurse if urge to push is felt
  • Breathe with her-have her mimic you
  • Help her catch contractions at start
  • Help her relax between contractions
  • Be Positive!

Pushing and Birth

What's going on?

  • Dilation complete
  • Baby moves down the birth canal
  • Head crowns
  • Delivery of head, shoulders, and then rest of body
  • Contractions 3-5 min. apart, lasting 60-75 sec.

How is she feeling?

  • Has strong urge to push
  • Relieved to be able to push
  • Renewed energy level
  • Feels great deal of pressure
  • Burning, splitting sensation
  • Is sociable again between contractions

What should she do?

  • Assume a comfortable pushing position
  • Use most comfortable pushing technique
  • Push only when feeling the urge
  • Pant or blow as the head is delivered
  • Relax perineum
  • Keep eyes open

How can I help her?

  • Help her assume a comfortable position for pushing (support neck and shoulders or legs while pushing)
  • Remind her to relax her bottom, check her face for relaxation
  • Coach her to pant or blow as head is delivered
  • Remind her to keep her eyes open
  • Be sure she can see in the mirror
  • Take pictures as baby is born

Delivery of Placenta

What's going on?

  • Mild uterine contractions
  • Separation and expulsion of placenta

How is she feeling?

  • Exhilarated
  • Possibly fatigued

What should she do?

  • Push with contractions as instructed
  • Hold and soothe your new baby skin to skin
  • Initiate breastfeeding
  • Use breathing techniques if necessary

How can I help her?

  • Take pictures of mother and baby
  • Hold baby skin to skin

Bonding and Recovey

What's going on?

  • Perineal repair if episiotomy was done or the perineum tore
    Identification procedures for baby
  • Begin breastfeeding and bonding with baby
  • Intermittent uterine contractions
  • Checking of mother's physical status

How is she feeling?

  • Exhilarated
  • Possibly fatigued
  • Hungry and thirsty

What should she do?

  • Have skin to skin contact, examine, caress, nurse and talk to baby
  • Make eye contact with baby
  • Take pictures of father and baby
  • Massage fundus of uterus
  • Eat and drink

How can I help her?

  • Share in bonding with baby
  • Take more pictures
  • Make telephone calls

Related Articles

  • Tips for Helping a Laboring Woman
  • Suggestions for Labor Partners
  • Premature Labor
  • Episiotomy
  • Tips for First Time Mothers
  • Induced Labor
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