Personalize Your Self-Care

Contributor

Aparna A Dandekar, D.O.

Sutter Pacific Medical Foundation

The concept of self-care is a foundation of integrative medicine. We believe in a patient’s innate ability to heal, and see influences like lifestyle, relationships and environment as important factors in health. For us, self-care plans based on patient needs and preferences can be a big part of the picture.

Lately, self-care has become a buzzword in the broader conversation about wellness. Ironically, this has been confusing, and even stressful, for a lot of people. So much advice has accumulated that it can be hard to make choices and feel adequate.

A solution to this overload is to follow the example set by integrative medicine practitioners. The idea is to give yourself the kindness and space to redefine self-care to fit your personal needs and expectations.

Self-Care Isn’t Selfish

You can begin by making yourself the priority of your self-care. It sounds obvious, but a lot of us prioritize the world around us — our families, our work, our communities. Often, if there's room left over at the end of the day, we're too exhausted to do one more thing, even if it is for our health.

Learn to be adamant about keeping some sacred boundaries and free time. It doesn’t have to be lots of time, but it should be enough for you to do a few things just for yourself.

Nothing Wasted

A lot of us are hard on ourselves, believing we don’t do enough self-care. It’s easy to feel defeated because you couldn’t do everything. It can feel like the whole concept is futile.

Realize that every step towards self-care is valuable. Every small action makes an impact that compounds over time and, at some point, will bear fruit. There’s an old proverb that applies: “Drop by drop, a huge lake is formed.”

Try to have one anchor activity every day, like walking. Focus on getting that done and anything else is bonus time. Schedule a 10 minute walk in the morning before work, 10 minutes at lunch time, and 10 minutes after dinner.

Guard those 10-minute intervals in your schedule — no phone calls, no chatting, no working. Even if it's just an indoor walk around the house, you’re still doing something you can feel good about.

Choose Your Battles

An anchor activity, along with faith in small steps, can help you begin to relax and enjoy self-care. Another important move is to identify the issues that are having a negative influence on your health. What habits or tendencies tend to weigh you down and cause you stress? Make solving for those issues a priority of your self-care plan.

Do some research and find a self-care tool that works for you. Practitioners at the Institute of Health and Healing can help guide you. A system that matches your needs and temperament can be a game changer for your mental health.

It’s Personal

The most important aspect of self-care is that it is subject to interpretation. Small steps, an anchor activity, removing a source of stress — these choices should reflect your needs and preferences. Give yourself permission to personalize a plan.

It’s helpful to approach self-care without judgment. Trying to meet outside expectations and getting down on yourself for not doing or achieving enough are traps to avoid. From there, the most effective self-care is the kind you define for yourself.