You've heard the sayings, "there are two sides to every problem" and "it takes two to tango." Designed to make us look at our own behavior, these adages presuppose that the person with whom you're tangoing wants to resolve a conflict. What do you do when the other person thrives on adversity and drama? First, ask yourself what drives this relationship. It may be based on:
- Perceived debt.
- Fear of disapproval.
- Fear of angering the person.
- Fear of losing the relationship.
- Fear of being perceived as a bad person.
- Fear of feeling guilty, selfish or unloving.
Erratic behavior is unsettling and disorienting. When someone close to you demands constant attention or blows up at you out of the blue, it's hard not to get upset. Remember that you only have control over your own behavior. If the difficult person is someone you have to deal with, here are some tactics to help you maintain your peace of mind.